Title: The Red Roses are... Surprised.
Author: warumono_girl
Band/Pairing: KaixRuki (Gazette)
Theme: 29. Surprise ( 30emotions)
Rating: PG
Warnings: kissing
Word Count: 532
Summary: Feelings shouldn't be kept locked on our hearts, by more than one reason.
Anxiety >> Surprise >> 4. Bewilderment


29#. Surprise
Kai P.O.V.

I didn't know what to say. I could have endured anything but that. You probably didn't have any idea how much I've been longing for you over these time, for you to just look at me in a way that mean only a little bit more than ' we're good friends', and just know, when I was just trying to realize what have gotten into you that it has been eating you over the need to get wasted every week, you just do this. Things can get so complicated if I just spill the wrong word. I've been expecting a lot of things but never this. I've realized that it probably had something to do with your private life, since you've been so down lately, but I was already giving up of the idea that maybe I could help you. Nothing could get me more shocked.

I Looked at you like you've grown another head, and still you were there, feet planted on the floor, not a move made, like if put a finger out of place everything could blow away and leave you hanging into a no escape fall.

-You what ?

I ask, even knowing that it was a stupid question, since I've heard you very well and clear from the first time, still I need you to tell me again. Nothing could surprise me more than your next moves. You just opened you eyes and looked to me with so much hurt in you gaze, like You've never have been felt more pain, and at that exactly moment I knew I had chosen the worst words ever to be said on a time like this. I just had time enough to clutch you wrist on my hand stopping you from taking away, running away from me, that was the last thing I wanted right know.

I just wanted to say how much I love you, and that I've been in love with you for quite some time now, but I knew if I were going to say that, you probably would have enough time to run away before the first sentence could have come out of my mouth. And so, I did the only thing that my mind could come with. I yanked you to near me and bluntly pressed my lips to yours. The pure though of kissing of you was so intoxicating that I wanted it to last forever, I brushed my lips over yours just wanting to feel your plush lips against mine, that sweet taste that's purely you, but I should have know how stupid my act was. I simply kissed you without anything said, I never though you'll be misunderstand me. How dumb I feel when you rough pull away from me and with tears stained cheek run away like your life depended on that. You should know that I don't react very well to abashing surprises.

I would never use you like he used to do. But I was too stupid to tell you that, and now, you're gone.

I just wished that I had told you sooner. Some things shouldn't be kept hidden, and now I know that.




Title: The Red Roses are... Bewildered.
Author: warumono_girl
Band/Pairing: KaixRuki (Gazette)
Theme: 4. Bewilderment ( 30emotions)
Rating: PG
Warnings: none
Word Count: 534
Summary: Feelings shouldn't be kept locked on our hearts, by more than one reason.
Anxiety >> Surprise >> Bewilderment



4#. Bewilderment
It took more than five minutes for me to register that. Fuck. That can't be true right ?! I was there, a blunt expression on my face, my mind have stopped working and still, I felt like I were trying very hard to accomplish something and failed. I've run an entire block over my apartment, didn't even caring for the rain, pouring down so hard that the sky could get down on us, and when I get here, fully soaked, you just stand on my door way.

What the hell are you doing here ? I can't face you right now. I still didn't have time to deal with your silent rejection, and neither with your kiss. What to you thought ? That I could have been satisfied to have you ? That I lusted for you ? Hell, no. You can't have misunderstood me.

On the moment I got my mouth to function again, every thing that got out of me was a weak why. Why haven't you said anything ? Why have you kissed me ? Did you think I'm a chap slut ? Are you disgusted with me ? And god, on that moment I was ready to anything but your gentle caress over my check, for you slowly pulling me inside, softy holding my hands .I didn't know how to react or what to say. You just lead me to my own living room and left to the bedroom, leaving me hanging there, alone, soaked to bones with a stupid expression on my face. Thousand thoughts passed my mind and not even one was happy. In all of then you've just gotten here to say how badly I have fucked up with my silly feelings, and maybe, just maybe, say that you're sorry for the kiss. I didn't want to hear you, not right now, nor never. I loved you so much for you to reject me and shove at me my own mistakes.

Still, I didn't move, not even a finger, afraid that every thing would shatter and the fragments would be too sharp for me to deal with. Over the longer minutes on my life you've returned holding one of the towel that you knew I stuffed in my bedroom closet , and started to dry me in a peacefull pace. My mind didn't wanted to register any of were happening. Everything seemed odd. What the hell were you doing ?

The only thing that I could do was hold one of your hands and just stare at you, like pleading for an explanation, and when your answer were nothing more than a simple smile, I started to freaking out. What the hell ?

Like sensing my mind you just hugged me, I could fell your body pressed to me, how my clothes soaked yours, the delicate patterns that your hands took over my hair. When you pulled, back I gazed at you eyes, and then I just wanted the time to end and never pass anymore. You were looking at me with just too much affection that it hurts. I didn't know if it was meaning to comfort me on what you have to say, but I just didn't care on that moment. Everything could freeze, and I would be just happy. Happy to have this moment to clung to. A moment when I felt how much you cared about me, even if everything got wrong in the end.